The Child's Best Teacher is YOU!!

Ever wonder what and who builds the foundation for a child to learn?  It's you!  Role models~ those a child looks up to and adores influence everything a child will do and say.  They influence learning on the most fundamental levels from the way they speak to a child to the behaviors they exhibited in front of a child.  A child who is spoken to in a normal tone of voice using a wide vocabulary from birth tend to speak clearer and are quicker to form sensible sentences than a child who only hears baby-talk and a limited vocabulary.  This simple behavior sets the foundation for all language and literacy development (reading and writing).  Children who experience a large diverse vocabulary in their early years tend to be better readers and therefore better students when they are in school.  So what can you do?  Talk to your child with a normal tone; read to them at least once a day if not more; sing songs; read poems and rhymes and let your child act out these things using movement illustrating their understanding in the form of play.  Show your child that reading is pleasurable by reading to them but by reading in front of them whether it's the newspaper, books (paper or electronic), etc.   Remember you must model the behavior you wish to see from a child for many years.   Make it meaningful and nurture your child during the process of learning and you will see them bloom beyond your expectations. 

This same basic principle applies to all areas of development.  If you are a coach potato that does nothing but watches TV and plays video games while at home, chances are that is what your child wants to do and will do.  They want to be like you.  So go outside~ ride bikes; swim; go to the park; run; play ball; swing and have fun as a family.  If you want your child to grow up physically fit show them how.  If you want your child to have healthy social relationships with the ability to express their emotions appropriately, you must model how to do this.  How do you get along with others?  How do you react to situations?  Are you physical?  Do you yell and scream then stomp off?  or Do you discuss, reason, compromise or agree?  What do you want your child to learn?  Teach them to use their words to express themselves and not their mouths or fists (biting or hitting).  Show them how to love, how to be friends and how to disagree.  Teach them about right and wrong.  Set reasonable age-appropriate expectations with reasonable age-appropriate consequences  but remember to model the behavior and provide consistency and follow-through if you want to be successful.  Children thrive with reasonable boundaries and guidelines.  It shows them you care if you follow-through and pay attention at all times.  The rules and consequences will change or be altered as the child ages, but remember to pay attention to what is of most importance to them because if they risk losing that, you will  have better control.  Is it easy?  No Way!  But it works.  It takes time and a huge amount of patience on your part.

Remember with children it is not the quantity of time but the quality of time you give them that has the greatest impact.   You are the one who offers them the opportunities and experiences that allow them to learn and grow throughout their young lives.  If you fail to offer them these opportunities or experiences as an outstanding role model, your child will not learn, or thrive.  Pay attention~ a child's behavior is typical transparent.  Although you often need to figure out what they are trying to say especially if you have not taken the time to show them how.  It's up to you.  Are you a good role model?

The same applies to bad behaviors like cussing, lying, stealing, fighting, smoking and drinking.  A child doe not come into this world with bad habits.  They are learned!  Typically they are learned from either adult role models or older siblings.  Beware of your own behaviors and the influence they have on young children.  I remember as a child always being told to "do as I say, not as I do."  However children prefer to do as you do and that does not always agree with what you say.  If you want your child to avoid bad habits and behaviors, you must first end yours.  Otherwise your child will grow up just like you in many ways.  Are you ready for your clone?  Maybe or Maybe not!  Depends on whether you have a good moral character to begin with.  So again, I ask, Are you a good role model?

Language and Communication

SOUNDS  ➜  WORDS  ➜  WORD STRANDS   ➜  SHORT SENTENCES   ➜  LONGER SENTENCES  ➜  CONVERSATIONS

Talk to your child from the womb on using a normal voice that is calm and comforting.  You want your child to learn to speak properly so talk to them properly.  Use complete sentences, pronunciation . . . .  Do not talk to them like a baby.  Oh it’s cute!  But do you want your child to grow up talking that way?  I didn’t think so.  We all want children to learn how to communicate with others; have conversations with others; be active listeners; understand and process the words they speak and hear.  Here are a few more suggestions to help your child develop language and communication skills which influence their ability to become literate as they grow:

• Use voice inflections and tone to show excitement . . . conveying meaning in speech and help your child to develop the ability to do so.  Nothings worse than to have to listen to a monotone person who has no inflections at all.  I don’t know about you but that puts me to sleep ~  Zzzzzzz
• Sit and chat with children ~ helps build stronger communication skills.  When you actively involve yourself in a conversation with a child, hopefully you are modeling good conversations skills.  Try to avoid saying Aha, Aha . . .  or nodding your head.  Use words just like you want children to do.   We want all children to learn to use their words to express themselves.  Children who have speech impairments or difficulties will find other ways to communicate and in most cases we do not consider them appropriate (touching, hitting, biting, throwing, grabbing, pinching, etc.)  We also want children to use words not tears or whining.  It’s important for you to remind your child often when they are young to use their words because you are unable to understand crying, whining, etc. 
• Talk to your child on the phone and let them say hello and share with relatives.  Don’t take the phone away until they are done talking and have said good-bye.  You and everyone else have to grow patients.  Children are often in no hurry, we are!
• Let your child say the blessing on their own or with you.  Let them create their own from time to time.  It doesn’t have to be perfect but it will be their thoughts put together.  Very important for cognitive development and critical thinking.
• Let children read you a story as soon as they are able providing correction or help only if they ask for it.  If they are struggling with a word, let them try to figure it out.  Too often as adults we lack this patience and blurt out the word before the child is ready and then they lose confidence, become frustrated and want to quit.  You want them to feel successful because the more anyone feels success the more they want to try.
• Have children dictate to you using their words to communicate in writing. If they receive a present from someone, have them tell you what to write in a thank you note.  Read their dictations back to assure you recorded them correctly. Do not chance their dictations ~ make it authentic. This encourages a child to want to write.
• When children get in a tryst or argument.  Do not immediately try to solve it for them.  Let them think it through and attempt to solve it on their own using their own words.  Never intervene unless the child has been injured or has harmed another or could in some way.  Only intervene if harm is or could be caused.  Otherwise let children solve it on their own.  If they come to you for help.  Tell them it is their disagreement not yours and they need to solve it.  If they say they do not know how, you may give them some advice but again do not intervene.  If the situation involves harm, you need to speak to both children separately to begin with.  First talk to the victim to make sure they are okay and ask them what happened.  Asked them if they could have done something differently to make it better.  Then talk to the other child and ask them what happened.  Then get both children together.  Tell them what you feel should of happened.  What rule was broken and/or what you did not like about the situation.  Then you need to ask the first child to tell the second how they feel.  And then have the second make the first feel better.  Please note you did not yell; you did not put words in anyone’s mouth; you did not tell anyone to say “I’m sorry.  Keep in mind the second child can say I’m sorry but it will be more meaningful if no one ever tells them to do so.  This way each child learns to use their own critical thinking skills and will grow both emotionally and socially. 

Preschool Tips~ for ALL!!!

For the next month I will be sharing simple parenting and classroom tips that will make your life a bit simpler if you try them.  Just remember to be consistent and stick with the ones you try.  Do not try all of them at once, it may be overwhelming for you but you can add new ones from time to time.  I will include 5-10 tips a day that follow the same area of learning for your child.  The first group deals with guidance and discipline~

• Use postive speech~ tell your child what you want them to do not what you don't want or like
• Use positive speech in setting rules at home and in the classroom.  Have children help create the rules.  It has more meaning to them and helps with self-esteem.  Review the rules daily until they can recite them back to you without your help.  You may want to revisit rules from time to time with your child to see if they should be changed or adjusted.  You can also discuss consequences at this time.
• Give positive reinforcement and incentives for good behavior
• Recognize good behavior always~ignore bad whenever possible (not causing a disturbance or putting self or others in harms way).  Typically the inappropriate behavior will stop because they are not getting any recognition or attention which is typically the purpose of behaving in any manner especially as a young child.
• Remain calm at all times.
• model ecpected behavior
• BE CONSISTENT and follow through!

Simple Supplies for Summer Fun

All parents have heard the words, "I'm bored!"  "There is nothing to do!"  Many times our children make the same complaint because they have not been encouraged to become independent thinkers who can entertain themselves.  We need to remember that it is not always the job of the parent or caregiver to entertain the child 24/7.  Children need to be encouraged and guided to explore and express their creativity and curiosity independently.  Parents can encourage these behaviors with a few simple activities and inexpensive supplies.

First set up an area that your child is allowed to get messy.  It could be an area on a patio, patio, basement, etc.  Then stock it with these simple supplies:  plain  and colored paper;  paper plates; paper cups; paper towels; glue; scissors; paint; markers; crayons, pencils; colored chalk; playdoh; rolling pins; cookie cutters; bubbles; bubble blowers; and other miscellaneous craft items that interest your child.  You may also want to set up an area with old clothes and items for dress-up or housekeeping as well as have puzzles; building blocks; word working materials and other independent activities that your child may be interested in.  Encourage your child to be creative and responsible for their area.  You may need to model the behavior or activities to begin with but eventually your child will be able to learn how to entertain themselves or their friends.  It is important that you allow the child the freedom to explore and express themselves in this area with the understanding that they will be responsible for cleaning up after themselves as well.  If you begin this regiment when the child is very young, you will find that at first you are doing quite a bit of modeling and helping with the clean-up but it is important that you have the child help right from the start.  If you begin to do it all for them, you will not teach them independence but dependence and you will find yourself always picking up after your child.  Be consistent and have the child assist with everything from the start.  Once they learn the routine, you will find that they will be able to clean up alone.  Reinforce this behavior and show pride in independent activities.  You find that this will help your child build initiative and integrity towards all tasks in their lives with some simple modeling and encouragement towards independence.

Once you have accomplished this you will find your child can entertain themselves without at television, computer or gaming system.  They will be independent and confident.